All right, listen up! I am Ms. Ana Thema, the respected headmistress for a prestigious private school. My husband, one of the government officials responsible for the implementation of the Banned Books Law (all books of any kind are illegal, ESPECIALLY for children) is quite right to despise the useless scraps we call “books.” The children of my school receive the highest quality education without any use of those morally corrupting books. With school back in session, I hope that no children are foolish enough to defy me or this law. If they do, the punishment will be severe.